New Specs!
Picked up my new specs today: love not having to look through a halo of scratches!
(yes, I have put on weight. It’s cold and the new medication is NOT HELPING. Just once, could I have a med that DOESN’T cause weight gain? )
A Conversation I Had To Have: Isolation and Loneliness, and A Really Bad Dress
This morning I was chatting with a dear friend – someone I’ve known since 1992, in fact. So this person KNOWS me, as much as anyone who doesn’t actually live with me 24/7 can, I guess.
And this person expressed concern at the way I have isolated myself. I realised that I didn’t have a single LOCAL friend I could call up today and just say “hey, let’s hang out.” Part of this is from being part of a couple, since I do like to spend time with Mr Beloved; a lot of this problem has developed because of my mental illness and my tendency to withdraw from the world (or as Alexander Woollcott once said , “like a sinking ship firing on all rescuers”. He said it about the British actress Mrs Patrick Campbell, but that’s not important right now.)
So I’m on this new medication and off the anti-depressants, and suddenly the days are really hard to get through. I need to actually find things to do. But I can’t work and I can’t volunteer for things because I’m too unreliable: on a Bad Day, I really can’t do anything. And I don’t know when a Bad Day might happen, so I can’t have anyone counting on me to show up. But I really DESPERATELY need more human contact and more exercise, both physical and mental.
Maybe I’m almost ready to join a gym again?
I feel like I’ve burned a lot of bridges: I had a disagreement with the Quilters Club (long story, involving blogs) so I don’t feel I can go back there; my former BFF (who I had a really DUMB fight with, although we were probably heading in different directions anyway) is one of the main movers and shakers of the local Sewing Guild, so I don’t feel I can go there, either. The gym I’d LIKE to go to – is where the former BFF goes. So if I went there I would inevitably end up running into her…
What else is there? How do I get out there and meet kindred spirits? Once upon a time I would have found a church but I lost my faith a long time ago now. There are lots of people to play with online, but I really need someone or a group of people that I can meet with In Real Life. And I need to be able to do this in a way that doesn’t cost very much at all – after the week we’ve had, the dog is eating better than we are, since we’d already bought her soup bones before The Day That Went Wrong. (I forgot to mention on that post that the washing machine flooded earlier in the day, too, just to make things even more fun…)
I had been going to Social Cr8te at the local scrapbooking shop, and probably will again, I just haven’t really been feeling well enough after the surgery yet. Maybe next Thursday. And I know a couple of the girls are probably doing scrapping there tonight, but for once Mr Beloved and I have something we both really want to watch: a special on the Eurovision Song Contest (for which we are utter tragics, it’s so kitsch and wonderful, even if SBS does insist on using their presenters rather than taking the British stream, which even without The Great Woges is generally funnier.)
So, this morning I was quite miserable about how shut in and lonely I have become. I went and woke Mr Beloved (who had not come to bed until about 5 am, as he was doing computer-y stuff, and fair enough, that’s his thang) and tried to explain that I needed to get out of the house but I wasn’t sure where to.
We ended up going for a walk around Toowoomba’s main shopping strip – or rather, what’s left of it after the big shopping malls have forced the closure of many of the smaller, older businesses. Lots of empty shops.
I did get a giggle from the sign for this business:
I think it’s the juxtaposition of yoga and burlesque that makes me laugh – apart from the business name, of course. From one extreme to the other, all in the one business. I’m almost tempted to go check them out…
And then there was this dress:
I had to post it to my facebook page as soon as I got home and ask: “WHAT is this dress doing? Anyone want to suggest an appropriate time and place to wear this?” (You’ll have to go see my facebook page for some answers…) I mean: Gingham with that – what’s it called – crimplene? finish, topped with plastic/metallic beading around the boobs, with more re-embroidered lace dripping towards the waist; then the border of black lace with another ruffle of tulle and then more black netting over white tulle – omfg, I don’t know WHO designed it, but I’d dearly love to know what was going on in their head.
So: what to do? Dear Friend who got me thinking about this suggested a book club; I’ve looked on the local council’s online guide but there’s not really much there that appeals. Surely someone else must have faced this – what did YOU do? Any suggestions gratefully received…
And if the cake doesn’t turn out….
- Add a lego construction worker to the rubble
- Fill the centre with the Birthday Girl’s favourite choc orange easter eggs
- light fancy candles
- and just laugh!
(and remember to do an extra layer of greasing and flouring the tin next time!)
The cake tasted GORGEOUS. Like a light choc orange mousse pudding. We were all laughing too hard to get non-fuzzy photos, I think!
But it smells so GOOOOOD!
(Polaroid frame from Kitschy Digitals‘ “Vintage Cameras ” kit; font is CK Ali’s Hand.)
Fingers crossed that this cake will turn out of the tin ok! I do adore my Nordic Ware tins, but sometimes the cakes stick a bit. (Anyone know here I can purchase “Bakers Joy” non stick spray locally? It’s NOT the same as the spray Mum used to use, this one is flour based…)
Anyway, the cake is to take to Social Cre8te (aka PLAYGROUP!) at the Local Scrapbooking Shop tomorrow. Since the Birthday Girl (the shop owner, Tammy) is mad for chocolate paired with orange, I decided it was time to give one of those cakes where you boil the oranges and blitz them in a food processor a go.
The only problem? I am GUARANTEED a migraine if I mix chocolate and orange – every single time. I had to wake Mr Beloved from his nap this evening for a taste test of the mix (yep, he got to lick the bowl, LOL!) and he reckons it’s lovely.
I’m planning on leaving it un-iced, just a few choc orange speckled easter eggs and a little bit of grated chocolate to decorate.
Will I be able to resist? Stay tuned for an update tomorrow!
Is it just me…
or does anyone else think that January 4 IS TOO DAMN EARLY FOR THERE TO BE HOT CROSS BUNS AT THE SHOPS?
(BTW – Easter is April 4. 12 weeks away.)
Just another night in the suburbs…and some pages
So where have I been? Around. Just not doing much. This time of year is always a downer – the CROWDS, the relentless Christmas music… as I was driving back from my chiropractic appointment yesterday I had the local commercial radio station playing in the car. They played Weezer’s version of “O Come All Ye Faithful” – immediately followed by Bloodhound Gang’s “you and me baby ain’t nothing but mammals so let’s do it like they do on the Discovery channel.”
Uh – right. Am I the only one to notice that’s a bit of a WTF moment?
Last night (well, early this morning, since this all started at about 1:30 am with a cascade of barking dogs as the youths in question ambled down the street) we heard breaking glass, lots of thumps… Mr Beloved reported the suspicious behaviour of the three kids, turns out so did a neighbour, also alerted by the dogs… and this is something of a miracle in itself, since usually the neighbourhood dogs bark unheeded for hours…
Young thieves, stolen Christmas presents including a block of very big new knives, and break and enter of commercial premises. Yikes. 4 police cars at one stage. Policeman with very powerful flashlights.
And next to no sleep.
Here’s Mr Beloved’s (much better and more coherent) version:
The dogs tell me first. The right sequence of barks, from Scruffy at the top of the street, down through Hamlet the Dane, Gillis the Dobermann, Psycho Bitch, Ugly Dog, Fat Staffy, Old Black Lab, and now my poodle… I can almost plot the intruders coming down the street.
Forewarned is forearmed. I was almost asleep when Scruffy started barking, a few hundred metres away. That was not just a bark: it was a serious let-me-at-’em, and Scruffy’s not normally a gung-ho kind of dog.
We’d gotten to bed late anyway. My partner’s reading light was turned aside to let me doze off. I wave my hand sideways with a cut-off motion, and now it’s dark.
I move as quietly as I can, given the old, creaky, wood floor I’m trying to cross . Damn it, I’m getting a bit old and creaky myself. Still, the instinct and reflexes haven’t let me down: I’m in time to see three kids go by, crouched forward and moving like Guilt itself was after them.
Two are about fifteen by appearance, not tall. One carries a box that looks like a carton of canned beer. Another has a light-coloured, almost cube-like carton: I make the assumption that is is a six-pack of premixed bourbon and cola.
The third kid is smaller, perhaps twelve, or a girl who doesn’t curve a lot. There’s a bundle in his/her hands. Moonlight makes spotting detail at even twenty feet a difficult job, but it looks like one of those eco-friendly shopping bags.
They’re headed for the park at the end of the street.
So, a spot of underage drinking is nothing to worry about? I dismiss the idea of letting it go: if they’re going to spew, make loud noises and leave broken glass, I’d rather it was somewhere else.
A quick phone call to Plod, and I wander down to the backyard. Across the fences, I can see a small white light in the bushes by the creek.
I relax. Even if the kids have night vision as good as mine, the LCD of that mobile means I’m as good as invisible, and I have them pinpointed.
Back to the house, and a follow-up call to the police operator. When that crew arrives, they now have an exact spot to shine those blinding lights. That will be demoralising for the kids in the bushes, provided a crew gets there on time.
Time is always crucial.
I’m ready when the first car arrives, about five minutes later. Plod doesn’t have the home advantage, so I shine a large torch into the area where the kids were.
Past tense is the thing. Even as the second patrol car arrives, thuds and breaking glass can be heard from a business across the road.
One of the police and I talk briefly, I give him some details of how many, approximate appearance, what they were carrying. Attention shifts to the source of the noises.
There are four cars, each with a couple of officers. From the look of the torch beams, they are inside the business premises, which means that the private security guys are on-site.
They’re taking this very seriously: individual cops are patrolling on foot in a number of areas on two blocks. I stay out of the way for over an hour and let them get on with their work.
My partner has stayed well out of the way. The dog knows her job: she’s looking after her Mum, staying quiet and looking for any hand signals to bark, search or whatever.
Eventually I leave the house and speak with the constables who are re-examining the area where I saw the kids hiding. I direct them to the exact point, and one cop exclaims, “Look! There’s a bit of gear here.”
There is. It’s most of a chef’s knife kit, new, in an aluminium-finish case. So there’s my assumption about a pack of bourbon tinnies shot down. Or stabbed.
Oh joy, there are some knives missing.
By now, it’s about 3:30 AM. I’m so heavily into hypervigilant mode, I can hear individual birds moving about restlessly as the humans invade their dark scrubland.
I give my name and details to one of the police and go back inside. As the police leave, I wait. So often the departure of Plod is the beginning of “Give it ten minutes and we’ll leave.”
This time the kids have all departed. It starts raining. I wait as dawn breaks, and have a walk around the block. There is a window broken at one end of the warehouse, but from my outside-the-fence viewpoint, I can’t tell if it was pushed in or out. That thumping and glass-breaking may have been the eastern side, and invisible from the road.
It may have been indoors. Forensic police spent a considerable time at the business premises later in the morning.
With the benefit of full sunlight and two hours’ sleep, I went back to the scrub at the end of the park. There were a few items further down the slope, missed in last night’s search.
The kids must have done a quick raid on somebody’s outgoing Xmas presents. There are tags “from Grandma”, a few cheap stocking-stuffer toys (discarded by the little thieves, who are obviously too sophisticated for anything less exciting than a long knife), hand-crocheted doilies, an address book with the crabbed writing of an older person.
I bundle the dew-soaked finds up, for handover to police.
I love the special feelings this time of year brings out in people.
***************************************************
So today: migraine. Yuk. And a heightened feeling of unease and danger. Doors and gates double checked. Triple checked. Rattled as I go past just to check again. I try to sleep away the migraine but mostly I’m restless and over-tired. Another day of feeling like I haven’t been able to achieve anything.
I did make a few (physical) scrapbook pages last week.
[clicky for biggy; paper is hand painted by me (inspired by some I can't get!); mask on photo from Paislee Press; background on photo is paper from Thao Cosgrove's digital kit "Beautiful Life" from scrapgirls.com]
[clicky for biggy; cardstock is Bazzill; paper by Teresa Collins; chipboard by Maya Road; Glimmermist by Tattered Angels.]
Quite enjoying that. Please excuse quick and dirty photos with parallax error. Oh, and did you know you can buy COLOURED staples? Who knew?! Now I just have to find a stapler (it’s somewhere in the house…)
This time of year makes me want to clean out the house. I got rid of an armful (heavy!) of magazine scraps today, ones that I’d already mutilated in my search for faces and alphabet pieces for my art journal. I’m planning to get into the sewing room SOON and move a lot of things OUT -as in, to the op shops etc – they are eating my physical and spiritual space. There’s little point in trying to flog small pieces of quilting fabric on ebay – the only people who make money from that are Australia Post.
Speaking of the art journal, here’s a quick pic: It’s actually too bulky to work in now, after painting and border-collaging the pages.
Most of the pages don’t have their main image or journalling yet but I am quite overwhelmed by the COLOUR and might have to start a new, more spontaneous journal. I haven’t been able to do anything in this one for at least 10 days and I hate feeling this STUCK.
Also, I think I need to go back to a smaller format, that fits in my bag. This A4 size is fun, but cumbersome.
Think it might be another bed day tomorrow.
Digidare #157
(clicky for biggy, please!)
Credits:Template: Chrissy W Freebie 34 Amylift (modified); Michelle Coleman Bohemian Summer paper ( x2) from Little Dreamer Designs, ribbon from same kit; Fonts: Credit River, CK Wellington, Circus Ornate; Swirl brush from Celeste Rockwood-Jones “Blossom Brushes” freebie.
I’m not thrilled with this layout, but I am pleased to have captured one of our non-traditional traditions. And yes, Mr Beloved and I do get quite silly!
This was the brief:
Non-traditional!
This time of year is SO nostalgic for me. I have so many wonderful memories of my childhood during the Holidays. There are the typical memories of finding the perfect Christmas tree, listening to holiday music, making gingerbread houses … but there are so many more obscure memories as well!
This week I want you to think of a non-traditional holiday memory you have from your childhood (or even a more recent year if you wish)!
Here are some examples of my own non-traditional memories:
- Traditional would be decorating the tree as a family. Everyone does that. Non traditional would be that our family eats frozen peaches for breakfast on Christmas every year.
- Traditional would be singing Christmas carols. Non traditional would be the funny way my dad sings a particular Christmas song every year.
- Traditional would be opening presents Christmas morning. Non-traditional would be the year my parents actually put coal in my stocking.
Dare Flair:
- If you don’t have a photo of the event, it’s ok to use no photos or stock photos.
- Since we’re talking about non-traditional memories, let’s go with some non-traditional colors as well! No red or green allowed!
- Let’s see some white space! Your photo(s) & elements can only cover 1/4 of your layout. Journaling, however, can cover as much space as you want.
- You must use at least one swirl brush
- You must use some fabric of some sort (felt, fabric, ribbon)
The Santa Tantrum Awards…
I was alerted to this by an online friend -it’s PRICELESS!!
From the San Francisco Chronicle: The Fifth Annual Santa Tantrum Awards!
(I especially like that there are “Bonus points if the department store Santa looks like he’s in physical pain, or if there’s a second non-crying child with an angelic look on their face.”)















